#1: Love is Hard to Come By
Once we find a person remotely close to what we envision we don’t ever want to let them go because we believe in the scarcity model when in fact love is everywhere. But love IS scarce when you recognize only 100 forms of it when in fact it can be endless.
“You’ll never find another lover like me”- every other R&B song
#2: Love is Only Valid in Certain Forms
When we believe love is scarce it leads us to rely on this one person for all of our needs. By placing (a monogamous) marriage, just one mode of practicing love as the Cadillac we are closing ourselves off to different modes of love.
#3: Breakups as Devastating
And if this one person this one source of love leaves of course we feel devastated. So what do we do? Me make it mandatory that they stay with us forever.
#4: Marriage is The Solution to Finding Long Lasting Love
Tax forms, raising children, living wills and power of attorney are the the best ways to show love? Love? What you feel from a kiss? From holding hands? Sex? You can practice love for free. Filing joint taxes ain’t romantic. Marriage had nothing to do with love at first. It was about adding wealth to families and building economic powerhouses.
Somewhere down the road we began to associate marriage as the ultimate expression of love. If you want life long love you can get that without marriage. Dogs show us love. They don’t sign any damn forms, but we know it’s authentic. You can find love in a marriage, but put simply marriage is hard. Love in it’s simplest form is not.
Getting married to experience love is building a mansion to house a mouse.
You might say marriage is supposed to be a forever kind of love therein lies it appeal while those other forms are fleeting. But who cares if they end? (#3 Endings are Not Devastating.) The sunset dies only to be replaced by a night sky (#2 It has Many Forms). What matters is that there’s more of it right after they’re done (#1 Love is Abundance).
